when something happens that i don't want to happen, after I cry I get mean. I don't mean too but.. it's just me.. and I don't want to do anything for awhile.. but what people at my house is yet to understand is that I don't want anybody to bother me for awhile thats why i'm quiet because i don't want to get mean and say something i'll regret.. I've been pretty good today tho.. not as mean as usually guess i'm learning to controll that.. I have to realize that the world isin't here to make me feel worse after somethings happen.. most people want to make me feel better.. but i like to make myself feel better..

The puppys gone it's over.. not my fault.. even tho i'm really angry that god didn't let it live.. angry at the world.. why does this stuff happen? I can't understand what that puppys purpus was.. was it to make me feel like shit?? or maybe make me stronger for the next worse thing that is going to happen?? god only knows..